Technomaly

A few days ago, the New York Times released a story on the do’s and dont’s of online dating, based on statistical analysis from the people at OK Cupid. Sure, you could read an entire article, but why not just let me synthesize the relevant data for you? Don’t you work hard enough?

• If you’re a man, don’t look into the camera or smile in  your profile picture. Because apparently women are looking for cold, calculating monsters.
• If you’re a woman, instead of showing off  your physical assets, pick a photo that shows you having fun or playing a guitar. I mean, you’re trying to pick up gay guys, right?
• Photos of people with their pets, on vacation or doing some kind of activity received more conversation requests than any other type of photo. You could take a photo of yourself on vacation playing guitar with your pet!
• Analysis showed that words like “cool” and “fascinating” worked better than “cutie” or “beautiful.” What, I’m not supposed to call some girl I don’t even know a total hottie? How will she know that I like girls?!
• Words that got less of a response? “hi,” “hello,” “hey,” “LOL,” “O RLY?” Words that got a better response? “ahoy” or “howdy.” So go ahead and tell every girl online “ahoy,” – I’m sure you’ll do great!
• Do not tell your date you Googled them. Unless you’re dating me, in which case, I’m flattered.